quote:

Originally posted by Alinda, the lost girl in long stockings:
yeah, the problem is that the answer i require isn't for "where is this relationship going?" but rather "where is this breaking up going?".
but then i suppose that five months aren't that long after all.

oooh, i see. now i get it. one of those. sorry, i didn't entirely understand you before. five months is slightly longer in that case.

i think you should lay out all the practical issues involved, with as little reference to emotion as possible, and then do the math and see what you come up with. you may or may not choose to share your findings with the other interested party, but you should probably act on whatever is produced in a timely matter.

is that better?

thank you cobalt, i'll try to put that in practice if i manage not to get emotions in the way as usual.
but should i ever come to drastic conclusions, i don't think i could put it in practice without first informing the other person. i just wouldn't feel good with myself if i did that

heh, fair enough. good luck.

quote:

Originally posted by Cobalt:
hey, Natalie.

um, anything i can do?

Mmmm, probably not. I like to stay monogamous in my painful one-sided obsessions. <---that's at me, not at you, by the way...

So how's your social life? C'mon, you know the only way to make the agony all better is to spread it around

HEY!

Steven's Listings of Apples isn't red, either.

I hate this Board.

I'm going back to the Rachel Ray's Garbage Bowl Message Board that my girlfriend is deballing me with.

Dammit'!

Dear Cobalt,

How do i know i'm real?

thank you

quote:

Originally posted by VegaRiad:

So how's your social life? C'mon, you know the only way to make the agony all better is to spread it around

heh. well, i'm pretty much on social life support at the moment. my sister had a big dinner thing at her place a couple of days ago and i met some cool people there. i'm maybe/probably moving downtown this summer. also possibly getting out of the country for a bit, if everything works out. going to drink with a bunch of people for my friend's birthday tonight. went to a book launch reading thingie yesterday. that's really about it. i'm having some issues with wanting to do things that i really should do...actually wanting them instead of just feeling some sense of duty. but we'll see.

*shrugs*

my boring life.

quote:

Originally posted by Tlön:
Dear Cobalt,

How do i know i'm real?

thank you

ah, this one's easy. Descartes took care of it centuries ago. he kind of went wildly off the rails after that point, philosophically, but he's pretty airtight when it comes to this.

"i think, therefore i am." right?

check it out: it's possible that every single one of your perceptions since you were born has been completely wrong. maybe your senses don't really give you any information about the world at all and it's all a wild delusion. maybe there's an evil demon who's devoting his existence to tricking you 24/7. but the thing is, even if all your perceptions are false, there still has to be a YOU who is wrong about everything. even if the evil demon is tricking you, there still must be a YOU there to be tricked. you might be a bodiless spirit or a brain in a jar, but there's still something, some thinking thing, somewhere having perceptions. what you're perceiving may not be real, but the fact that you're perceiving them cannot really be doubted.

"there are words in front of my eyes" may or may not be true. "i am seeing words" can't be doubted.

so while you are aware of yourself, you must exist. those times when you're not really paying attention and everything seems to disappear, who knows? but as you think, you must exist.

does that help?

Dear Cobalt,
How do I generate business for the bar kitchen i work at??
Love,
James

quote:

Originally posted by Cobalt:
does that help?

I never thought about it that way. I always thought, "If I see words, they are real. At least to me, which is what matters anyway.", but never thought of concentrating the argument around myself.
Vry cool

Dear Cobalt,
How can I stop being shy around guys I like and acting like a total dimwit?
Yours Truely,
silly punk

quote:

so while you are aware of yourself, you must exist. those times when you're not really paying attention and everything seems to disappear, who knows? but as you think, you must exist.

does that help?

Maybe it does, maybe it doesn't but damn, that is an intriguing way of looking at it.

So that's what happens when I zone out ...

quote:

Originally posted by destroythedivide:
Dear Cobalt,
How do I generate business for the bar kitchen i work at??
Love,
James

free stuff is always good, as someone else mentioned. hot waitresses. nachos are essential. deals on food and drinks, like $2 wing Mondays or whatever. and contests! funny hats!

good luck, let us know if any of this works.

quote:

Originally posted by silly_punk, aka the kitten that kills!:
Dear Cobalt,
How can I stop being shy around guys I like and acting like a total dimwit?
Yours Truely,
silly punk

i think my best advice would be to cultivate a healthy apathy. what's the worst thing that could happen? if it happens often enough, getting shot down can actually become a lot of fun. if you realize that, you win whether you get anywhere with the person or not. also, being really honest with people you like feels quite nice, especially after a long time of keeping your cards close to your chest.

does any of this sound reasonable? i hope it's helpful.

quote:

Originally posted by Mythos:

Maybe it does, maybe it doesn't but damn, that is an intriguing way of looking at it.

So that's what happens when I zone out ...

heh, yeah, that Descartes was an intriguing guy. not always the most airtight reasoning, but definitely makes you want to go along with him. think about it: how do you know that you exist when you're not experiencing existence? what happens to you when you sleep? it's cool to imagine.

dear cobalt

i recently decided that i would like to learn how to turn my emotions on and off at will. i'm convinced that with a bit of practice it can be done, like drinking poison to build an immunity. i think it will probably be a painful process, learning, but once i can do it i think it will be extremely useful and therefore worth the effort.

do you have any suggestions on how to make the process easier, or how to go about it, or whether i should be trying this at all? anything really.

yours,
me

dear cobalt,

i'm being a coward and can't take it anymore. could i just be someone else instead?

a chicken.

(P.S.: Don't call her hen, Cobalt. )

Inagreyplace, if you and Cobalt don't mind my input...
It is indeed possible to shut on and off your emotions, at least to a certain extent. I managed to do that. I can't tell you how to do it, since it was something I did unconsciously, apparently.
But my advice: don't do it. It hurts. It's painful. Like killing something alive, like a plant or a small animal. And you can't stop doing it. And it makes you feel lonely and bad. And you miss out things.

So, my question to Cobalt would be:

Dear Cobalt,
How can I feel again? I mean, truly, fully, 100%, like I used to. How do I stop being afraid of my feelings?

Hugs,

clover without a heart

aaaah......clover......I'm kind of with l'grey. I think shutting back down (except with Geoffrey) is the way I need to go. Beats the hell out of walking around with an open wound where my heart used to be.

Okay
cobalt-
How do I do this? I'm so sick of swallowing tears.
-Beeze