Dear Lady J's Boss.

Here is a link for you: TRY IT.

From me.

seriously. even Miss Manners says that the customer isn't always right. the customer's only always right if you value the customer's money and returning business; as this guy probably won't be back, I'd've said "screw you, jackass!" in a very clever way.

o.O

Lady J your manager is the crazy. Closed is closed!
*snuggles archaic trading laws*

Dear Family (except Mom, who has a good excuse):

Okay, seriously. Do you realize how much money and vacation time I have invested into visiting you for important events such as marriage/moving/holidays/new houses/unemployment crises?

I've done the calculations-- the money I've spent in airfare, rental cars, hotels and gas money in the past 10 years could have easily become a downpayment on that home I am struggling to save up for. What's that? You all own homes? Huh. Isn't that great for you. It must be easy to pay for those homes with all the money you've saved not visiting me.

Do you understand that because you live hundreds of miles away from me AND each other, any vacation time I get is inevitibly invested into spending time with you instead of things like visiting friends or travelling abroad?
And that if I DO take some time off to visit a friend, I inevitibly feel guilty because its time I could be spending with you?

Do you comprehend the fact that in the DECADE of my living in Ohio, only two of you have visited me more than once...as in...TWICE?

So when I send you an e-mail inviting you to come see the play that I'm in, it's a very clear, very up-front indication that your presence is quite important.

I realize it's just a play. I realize that it's not as though I'm getting married or having a baby or something, but, trust me, this is very important to me. And I had been under the assumption that a family is there for each other during the important parts.

So this is me officially hurt, pissed, disappointed, bitter and feeling pretty damned petty that not one of you could be bothered to come to see me in my play.

When I DO get married I wonder if you will be bothered to come to visit then. I take that back..of course you will, because such things matter to you. But I wonder if I'll be bothered to invite you. One the most important day of my life, I'd much prefer to be surrounded by people who were there for ALL the important parts.

Self-pityingly yours,

Al

Dear Limertilly:

Thank you for providing me with endless hours of amusement! God people are so stupid. I'm printing at least one of those stories off and sticking it on my staff room bulletin board.

LJ

Dear "I'm Voting for McCain Cuz Hillary's Not Obama's Running Mate, So Nyah! *sniffle* *sniffle*" People:

You are fucktards.

Fuckfully Yours,

Al.

Man, you're having quite a run, Alaura.

*big hugs*

Damn family. They shouldn't be disappointing us! And I hope your play will be just simply wonderful and that many other people who care for you will be there.

Hey, you. Yeah, you. The tall, nerdy kid who's had a crush on me for far too long.
Yeah, you.

Ok, so you are talking to the customer I was talking to a little while ago.
You don't need to come over to my cube and stare alternately at my boobs and my mouth while asking me what to do with the guy.
I put the instructions in the goddamn case notes. Replace the system board.

Leave me alone. I know, you like me. Get over it. I have a boyfriend and you live in Dreamland if you think I'd choose you over him. He is amazing.

Have a nice day.
-me

Dear ResLife -

I'm not sure how I managed to be so luck and talk to the only two competent people in the office, but thank you for getting back to me quickly and with a decent answer. See you tomorrow.

-Another student



To my personal belongings -

Once I manage to get a hold of my fairy godmother, you are so packing yourselves up. In the meantime I'm going to continue sitting here in my sweats and do some more wishful thinking.

-Your lazy owner

Dear cute girl in my italian class,
Hi, I'm jesse. What's your name?

Dear Twin,

Are pics of TwiMin (and TwiBot, actually) prominantly scattered about your cubicle? I would blow them up even bigger and, like, force him to walk through it or something to get to you.

quote:

Originally posted by El Leprechaun:
Dear cute girl in my italian class,
Hi, I'm jesse. What's your name?
Ciao bella!
Come ti chiami? Mi chiamo Jesse.
Ti va andare a prendere un caffè?

Fixed that for you.
(and pardon my Italian, it's google-based )

She pulled the white blouse back up
"Did you do that for me?"
"Yes, and no, but does it matter?"
"Yes and no."

Later, he'd left, and she posed there in the window ledge,
Felt the breeze move through her like rough cotton on the line,
Turning the coin over and over
Until it was warm and she fancied not needing it.

It's the same thing she did, after all.
It didn't matter if she did if for them or to them or with them or merely near them.
A gift contemplating the transubstantiation from object to intention,
She shook her head, questions fit only for paper called and faded like seabirds.

She imagined him walking though forests in his sleep
His dreams impressing themselves on the shape of the world.
The sacred and the profane are mouth and teeth
Sharing the same hunger, and the same smile.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: digitalprimate,

quote:

Originally posted by McApathy:
Dear Twin,

Are pics of TwiMin (and TwiBot, actually) prominantly scattered about your cubicle? I would blow them up even bigger and, like, force him to walk through it or something to get to you.

they are all over my computer wallpaper. a different one every day, almost. its very hard to miss. plus i talk about Twi all the time... he's just... hanging on or something.
O.O

think outside the glowy box! I'd print 'em up. frame something. make him acknowledge that TwiMin is not just some guy who lives in your glowy box and from whom you can therefore be lured away.

Dear R,
I do know you are not really interested in me & only got back in touch to find out about M. Fact is I have no idea & no intention of finding out. Sorry to burst your bubble, but we lost touch for a reason: I found a set of decent people, who don't belittle everything I say & do, who don't expect me to help them & then never do anything in return. I have a busier & more wonderful life than I ever thought I would. You, however, are the same as you were 7 years ago: small minded, selfish & a really bad liar. Also if you had any kind of clue about other people at all, you'd realise how badly M behaved in Cardiff & how unlikely it is that I have any clue what happened to her.
But, if you do decide to try & find her, I wish the best of luck and I will still help you if you need it. But don't expect me to be interested in being friends with you again.
L

Dear M,
so I have been reminded of you again. And I realised how long it's been since I thought of you. It's funny you were my best friend (or so I thought) for 6 years & you've now been missing for longer than that. People still think I know where you are: I don't & I'm not sure I'd want to. I hope you are not dead, though that's your presumed status now. Thing is I don't think our friendship was ever very good for either of us. I've met so many people in the last seven years & changed for the better. I'm not sure that would have happened if you'd stayed around.
But whatever you are doing, I wish you well.
L

quote:

Originally posted by McApathy:
think outside the glowy box! I'd print 'em up. frame something. make him acknowledge that TwiMin is not just some guy who lives in your glowy box and from whom you can therefore be lured away.

Better yet...print out a huuuuuuge poster of him (paste several sheets of paper together) and stick them on his cubicle.

good for you, Waspyfarer!

Dear school,

I know I only attended one day, but honestly I don't think I have the motivation and dedication to complete this program.

I've got a job interview coming up on Tuesday and that's what I really want to do. I don't want to show up completely exhausted for that interview, so I'm dropping out of school.

Having two kids and studying full time with a 1 hour commute each way is more than I can handle.