*giggles*

niiiice.

Well, there was one incident of some bad pepperoni pizza that laid me up for a day and a half, but that isn't new. So, I'll relate what happened to my sister on a family road trip when she was about 12.

We were coming back in the family van from visiting my grandmother in Arizona. My dad was driving, my sister was in the passenger seat, my mom was in the middle seat and I was napping in the far back. Suddenly I hear a *thump* then *tatatatatatat*. My sister screams as my dad hits the brakes and pulls to the side of the road. It turns out that a bird hit the windshield _right_ in front of my sister, and was then decapitated by the windshield wiper. Some portion of its neck was caught in the windshield wiper, so its body rolled off the window, but its little head was left to shake in the breeze of the moving vehicle, tapping its beak on the windshield. My sister said later that it was as if the detached head was pecking at the windshield wanting to be let in.

*pops a blister on his heel*

*lets his dogs lick it clean*

That's actually pretty standard behavior for a dog, I believe, cleaning out the wound of a 'packmate' to prevent infection.

Of course, I would just put a band-aid on it...

Now, since this is the gross-out thread, I'll post something gross. I was out hunting with my dad and his friend "Cal" one time, and we came across the relatively fresh carcass of an antelope. No bite marks or pieces missing or anything, so it either just keeled over, or was shot by another hunter who then couldn't find it. At any rate, it had been sitting around for a few days, and was a little rotund. Cal pushed it with his boot, and a wet, flatulent sound escaped from the carcass as the gases that had developed after death escaped through various orifices. This evidently amused Cal no end, who proceeded to make the dead animal fart for several minutes while my dad and I grew rather bored.

Once worked with a meth addict called "Tricky" who only had six teeth.
We had a customer order chili during one of Tricky's shifts. After receiving his food, the man complained about something floating in his chili.

...Tricky ended the shift with only five teeth.

Grossest part is the guy had eaten half the bowl before he noticed the tooth floating in it.

quote:

My sister said later that it was as if the detached head was pecking at the windshield wanting to be let in.

Goodness! That should be in a movie!

Like a remake of The Birds?

Man, these stories are good! I'm going have to think of one of mine to post.

OOOh...I just remembered this one:

You know how guys like to shoot the snot out of their nose to the ground using one finger and blowing really hard?

My Dad loved to shoot his snot out and then say, "Get it Inky!" to our dog. Inky would then enthusiastically gobble up the snot.

This thread is completely hilarious. I thought of two stories I can add.

(1) My ex-boyfriend got really drunk one night and woke up sort of hungover, sort of still drunk. He ate some dill pickles and drank a can of Coke very quickly. Then he suddenly had to puke and he puked very, very violently (luckily in the toilet). But the puke was so forceful that part of it went up into his sinuses and came out his nose. He later felt like he had a huge booger in his nose and pulled out half of a dill spear.

(2) I temped for a while as a medical transcriptionist in a teaching hospital in the Ear, Nose, and Throat Surgery department. They had a fridge for the med students and a fridge for the office staff, so one morning I put my lunch bag in the staff fridge as usual. When I went to get it out, I got the shock of my life. On the top shelf there was a severed human head staring out at me and next to it was a half of a human head. I actually screamed out loud. What happened was the students had run out of room in their fridge and thought nothing of using ours for their cadavers. I left my brown bag in there and never packed lunch again during my whole time temping there.

Three years ago, I burned my fingers while lifting a heated glass lid from a pot that was in the stove. My fingers hurt for a while and developed these blisters.

The blister on my left thumb was particularly painful. Most of the right side of it was white. After a while the pains subsided (the next day). But the blisters of course began to fill up with liquid. The blister on my left thumb began, essentially, to bloat. It became distended and swelled out. Let me put it this way -- it was very disproportionate to the shape of my thumb. At some point it started to ache, so I waited a while and twisted a section of the blister.

It deflated. For a while it hung off my thumb like a piece of wet white plastic. The kleenex I used was a little soaked too. I waited for the skin underneath to fully heal and then I peeled it off as it dried.

I felt much better afterwards. A very interesting experience all around :P

Gross enough for you?

I was once bending a bit of coathanger with some pliers. I was sitting clross legged, and braced the wire on my upper thigh. Somehow, without realising it, I manages to grab and twist a bit of my flesh along with the wire. I had a little bit of flesh off, and it was all bloody and I still have a scar. Yummy.

And, my guinea pig had a cist on her bum (guinea pigs are mostly bum, after all) and the vet had to draw out the fluid with a syringe. It was a BIG syringe and the fluid was all grey and gloopy and had darker grey lumps in it!

AND I once saw someone be sick in a pint glass then DRINK it! No lie.

I think I need a little quiet time now.

Once I was at my grandparent's house and I was walking on a splintery wood floor in bare feet and I got a splinter about 2 inches long and a quarter-inch wide in my foot under my skin. My mom had to slit the skin of the sole of my foot open with a pocketknife so we could get the splinter out and clean the wound. *shudder*

I had to do that the other day - and the splinter was just a single hair, that was nonetheless causing me incredible pain as I walked.

It wasn't fun digginng in the sole of my own foot with a pocketknife, though.